printre randuri si file

"I do love you", I said, " I do.I've been crying all night.I thought I would never see you again."
When I said this, Maxim laughed and put his hand over mine.
"One day I'll remind you of these words.It's a pity you have to grow up", he said.


Fragment din Rebecca de Daphne de Maurier,varianta in engleza...si.. mi-a deschis ochii. Ce-o sa mai rad peste nici un an de ce spun acum, de cum ma comport momentan, de cum reactionez in diferite situatii. Ce-o sa mai regret... fiecare pas, fiecare privire, fiecare silaba...I always do that.
M-am regasit surprinzator de mult in gandirea si comportamentul naratoarei.La unele faze ramaneam socata, in timp ce citeam.Disperarea aia continua, nelinistea, paranoia, frica, visarea continua, fragilitatea interiorului, dar calmitatea si uneori puterea exteriorului trupului.

Esenta in majoritatea gandurilor mele: "I was too young for Maxim,I knew too little about the world.The fact that I loved him made no difference.It was not the sort of love he needed.Maxim was not in love with me.He had never loved me.He did not belong to me, he belonged to Rebecca." Da, minte bolnava, incapatanata si fara pic de self-esteem.
Cat de naiva pot fi most of the time...Un singur lucru e bun in toata treaba asta in legatura cu mine, anume ca nu mi-e greu sa recunosc defectele, ci, chiar, am o mare problema cu complimentele si cu calitatile.Nu le vad, nu le recunosc, le evit. Ce ar trebui sa insemne asta?

Consecintele a 24 de ore fara electricitate? Well, lets see : o carte intreaga citita, invatat vreo 5 ore, scris (aberatii, dar totusi scris) pagini intregi. Bun, chiar bun. Can't wait for the next time!
Mi-ar trebui mai multe zile d-astea sa ma las si eu de dependenta pt calculator.Suuure!

"Tear out her heart and leave her in pain"